It's really fascinating to learn about Children's' development. There are many interesting facts that I've learnt and it really makes me wonder how much the children will benefit if ALL child care providers and primary school teachers were made to learn what I'm learning.
I learnt that children have different temperaments. And they were born with it, and will basically stick with it throughout their lives. There are 3 types. Flexible (Easy-going), Fearful (slow to warm) and Feisty(difficult)
50% of children are born easy-going. That means they are cheerful and adaptable, and they don't make a fuss but will still be able to show their needs to the child-care provider.
15% of children are the fearful type. They are timid and if pushed too quickly, end up withdrawing into their comfort zone. Familiarity is key for them and they need someone special and stable.
10% of kids are feisty. They are active, intense, irregular and easily distractable. They resist being rushed. If they don't get their way, they will be disruptive.
So we know that kids are naturally one way or the other... but it is common for adults to force or train their children to become obedient and they parent their kids in a way comfortable for themselves. I'm not saying that they are selfish cause all parents love their children so much. They just don't know they can do it even better.
Parents sometimes do things intentionally thinking they are helping their children, but it may not necessarily be the case. Pushing a fearful kid too quickly out of his/her comfort zone and disappearing may make it difficult for them to learn or trust in the future (I don't know the exact consequences but there really could be LT repercussions). And forcing the feisty kid to be quiet or take a timeout may not work at all.
Another thing we learnt is the Band of Arousal. This also lasts a lifetime. Some people were born with a narrow band of arousal... they can only function well with low levels of stimulation. Some were born the opposite. The stimulation can come from the artwork hung on the wall, the colour of the walls, the music in the background, the people talking to you, people jumping and dancing around etc. If you put someone in a highly stimulated environment, and the person has a narrow band of arousal, it won't be the optimal environment for learning.
Of course, as we grow older, we learn that we can't control our environment... so you may argue that it's good to let the kid learn from young. But I feel they may not be developed enough to grapple with all the less than optimal conditions. People mature and become wiser... the fearful kid will learn to adjust to survive in this competitive world. They still have a degree of control. For example, if they fear change and fear new environments, they can choose routine work.
People are indeed built differently. Since they have no control over WHO they are, they can only control HOW they behave.
No comments:
Post a Comment